This morning I awoke and looked down at my oversized, overstretched, very fuzzy belly that is, at this time, our Lizzy girl’s home. I rubbed her back…well actually her butt because that is what she had sticking out this morning and wiggled my way out of the covers…thrusting my body off the side of the bed in order to use the bathroom for the twenty-ish time and to also let the pups outside as they were getting restless awaiting Mom and Dad’s assent from the sheets. I quietly made my way out of the room telling our boys to be quiet as to not awake their Daddy and I waddled to the back door to let them out. I then made my way to the kitchen to make my morning cup of Spark (it’s an Advocare thing), loaded the dishwasher with the dishes my husband left in the sink from the evening before, and then made my way to let our pups back in the house for breakfast.
This has been the norm for many many mornings. A routine…a plan…a way of life as you will. I am a creature of habit to say the least. However this morning was different…along with the urge to finally sit down and write at my computer I also felt a strong urge to soak up every single moment of today. Telling myself internally…lets not forget any of this. Remember this belly…remember this time.
To be honest, I’ve been avoiding the blank pages of this blog. Avoiding urges here and there to sit down and write down how I have been feeling these last few weeks. I’ve been avoiding it because I haven’t wanted to open the flood gates. I’ve been protecting my daughter from my insecurities and fears of motherhood…I don’t want her to somehow feel what I am feeling prior to her arrival. In fact, those feelings and emotions I will not be sharing until after her arrival for that very reason.
I still wanted to write this morning, mainly because today is a very special day. Today is the last day that Lizzy will be housed inside of my womb. We of course gave her her own chances to come out on her own time but she has chosen to be stubborn and for our own reasons along with the guidance of our doctor we scheduled induction for tomorrow morning at 8:30am. As of last Thursday we were already dilated to 3cm, my cervix had started to tilt forward, and it was softening so we are hopeful that our induction process will be short and we will be holding our baby girl for the first time tomorrow!
Dearest Lizzy, Your 9 month lease is passed due. You are hereby asked to vacate the premises within the next 48 hours. Other living arrangements have been made and eagerly await you.
We cannot wait to meet you!
We love you Bear, Jackie, Peanut, and Lizzy!
#lizzylee #ourjackofhearts