Everyday is different, every hour is different… I never know how I am going to feel. This roller coaster of emotions is a nasty one.
On Monday the hubs and I received word that we were approved for funding to have an extensive genetic test done. We were informed that we would be contacted within a week or so to set up an appointment. I received our phone call this afternoon and I have arranged for Jack (my husband) and I to meet with the Genetic team at Cardinal Glennon on Friday! I am unbelievable humbled, grateful, appreciative…thank you just doesn’t seem to cover the feelings I have toward this opportunity that we have. There is that side of the coin but then there is the other…as I sit here feeling grateful I cannot help but hope…hope for answers…hope for our future…questions, so many questions…followed by tears…a deep breath…everything will be okay, everything will happen exactly how it’s meant to…back to hope…all I can do is hope that the way it’s meant to be will be even close to what I wish for. And what if it’s not? What if what we want is just not in the cards for us? What if we will only be parents of two beautiful angels? What if…
I can only HOPE…hope that “the man upstairs” can give me/us the strength to endure and to have faith that he knows better than we.
The world breaks everyone and those it doesn’t break, it kills. There is no shame in being broken, you just have to pick up the pieces and start rebuilding.
Mommy loves you.
#ourjackofhearts #angelmommy #chdawareness